Crappy Sumo

When you're poor and in college there's a bright ray of financial hope that comes twice a year: financial aid disbursement day. On that day every poor college student feels like they're Oprah-rich. For Shayla and I that day was yesterday.

I guess the theory behind federal financial aid for "higher learning" is that it is an investment to create a more educated and productive population, which in turn raises quality of life, helps the economy, and adds to the pot that pays the welfare checks of those who choose not to take advantage of it.

But, as you may expect, financial aid money isn't always spent wisely by those who receive it. It vaguely reminds of some recent event where the government gave out a huge sum of money with no semblance of accountability...

What was it? It'll come to me...

Anyway, I'm sure Nintendo, Microsoft, Apple, Sony, Abercrombie, and Lovesac all had a small spike in their stocks this last week. What student doesn't need a government-subsidized 52" flat screen?

Well, to celebrate the federal government's investment in my future I took Shayla to a Japanese restaurant in Provo called Happy Sumo. I'd been there once before a couple years ago and have fond memories of their delicious teriyaki chicken, but remembered it being a little expensive so I was waiting for a special occasion to go back.

Now, they say that over time our memories are altered to either remember only the good in a positive experience or only the bad in a negative experience. My memories of Happy Sumo were all positive until yesterday. I predict they will all be negative in the future. It was a huge disappointment. I don't know where to begin and I don't want to rant, but I would like to issue a word of caution. If you are driving from American Fork to Provo and see the billboard for Happy Sumo, the one with the happy couple feeding each other sushi, just realize that they are only happy because they were finally seated even though the restaurant was only 1/3 full on a Friday night, and are so happy because they finally got their food that they don't even notice how dry it is and that the portions are meant only to be filling to an anorexic 6-year-old.

Are these sentences too long? I need an editor.